Integral Development Forum

Consequences of procrastination

If we can see some of the damage that it does, we are probably better equipped to resist it or to turn it around when we do succumb to it.

Typically, delaying the performance of some assignments or tasks can lead to traumatic situations.

Sometimes it leads to the loss of a job or a title or an honor. Sometimes it just leads to the loss of respect – both from others and for ourselves. Procrastination ultimately leads to lower self-esteem.

When self-esteem begins to suffer, so many other areas sustain losses as well.

It creates a high degree of dissatisfaction and frustration, not only among other people, but internally as well. Procrastination can then lead to physical consequences. As the weight of guilt, stress, and fear takes its toll, experts tell us that it can greatly affect our health.

We can agree together that the consequences that come as a result of procrastination are serious and undesirable and that there must be a better way.

• Exercise:
  Do you see these consequences manifesting in your life when you procrastinate?
  Which consequences do you feel the effects of most?
  

Procrastination is a habitual way of fraudulently justifying to ourselves that a particular endeavor should not, does not need to, or cannot be started now.

Sir Isaac Newton said that a body at rest stays at rest, and a body in motion stays in motion. This is especially true in the case of procrastination. It is the energy required to begin the motion that we tend to struggle with. So how can we get into motion and avoid procrastination? First, we must determine our reason for procrastinating.

Dr. Joseph Ferrari, Ph.D., associate professor of psychology at De Paul University in Chicago, is one of the world’s leading experts on procrastination. He identifies 3 types of procrastinators.

The first category is the thrill seekers. These procrastinators oftentimes wait for the adrenaline rush that comes when a deadline is approaching. It would be far better to be productive with my time and to complete the work on the speech with plenty of time to spare.

The second major category to talk about is the avoiders. These procrastinators are driven by the desire to avoid things, rather than to achieve things. They may wish to avoid discomfort, hard work, the unknown, risk … the list could go on. Avoiders usually fill their time with things that distract them from what they really need to be doing: things like housework, television, Facebook, etc.

The final major category is the indecisive procrastinators. There are many people who really hate decision-making and feel that procrastinating on a decision, especially the decision to “begin”. The problem with this line of thinking is that not making a decision is in itself a decision! This type of thinking always leads to procrastination.

As you think about procrastination, don’t beat yourself up about it. We all do this from time to time. The point is … how can we be better?

• Exercise:
  Think about the 3 basic categories of procrastinators.
  Which do you usually fall into when you procrastinate?
  

Introduction

Perhaps the first lesson of the day is that a simple awareness of a tendency to procrastinate is an important part in overcoming it.

Once we have wasted time, it cannot be regained. So let’s think about some ways that we can be better about persisting rather than procrastinating.

It is amazing to me how many of us continue to put things off until we arrive at what we believe will be a better time to do it. We convince ourselves that there will come a more convenient time, a time when we are better prepared, a time when there are not so many other things vying for our attention.

Why do we do this? How do we recognize it when we do it? Is there anything we can do about it, or is it just part of the human experience? What about the times when there are “legitimate” excuses for putting things off? How do we motivate ourselves to do the things that we are procrastinating about?

The experts tell us that most all of us procrastinate, and many of us do it chronically, habitually. In fact, according to Psychology Today, 20% of people identity themselves as chronic procrastinators. Hopefully you do not fall into the chronic category, but I believe that everyone has room for improvement in this area.

So … let’s get to it!

• Exercise:
  Evaluate your to-do list. Is there anything on there that you have been waiting for perfect conditions to begin?
  Is there one step you could take towards it … today?
  

It is often confused with “endurance”. Endurance is a good thing, but it’s more about surviving. Endurance is vital to the accomplishing of a goal, but it is more about developing the stamina to persist through the difficult situations of life. Persevering, however, is about thriving.

“I will … until”. Once the course of action is set, I will continue down that path, adjusting when necessary, until I reach my goal.

There is another principle of success that goes hand in hand with perseverance, and that is visualization. “Get a clear mental picture of what you want, fill it with emotion, and hang on”.

When the challenges come, and it’s a fact of life that they will, perseverance means we will find a way around them. We will find the good, extract it, and then navigate around the bad and on to the goal.

I invite you today to take some time to think about the ways that you can persevere through your circumstances and obstacles. Remember that the fuel of this perseverance comes from a deep passion for the purpose that you are pursuing.

• Exercise:
  What is the purpose that you are persevering for?
• What are some obstacles that are in your way?
  

Things that are rigid break faster than things that can bend.
Life is full of circumstances that could break us if we are not prepared to handle them.

Our plans, no matter how perfectly mapped out and executed, rarely succeed without some adjustments and midcourse corrections.
If we are not willing to be flexible and adjust our original plan, we can become defeated, jaded, bitter, and accepting of our failure. We break.

“You have to have your goals in concrete and your plans in sand.” The goal doesn’t change, but how you get there might have to. In fact, it probably will have to change in greater or lesser degrees. If that variation in strategy derails you, then you will always be on a slower and harder path to achievement.

We need to be flexible—adjusting to overcome circumstances and respecting the teams of people we work with.

Remember, the goal does not need to be fickle, shifting in the wake of circumstance and emotion. It is the plan and execution that needs to remain flexible, so that the goal can be achieved.

• Exercise:
  What current plan that you are trying to execute could benefit from some flexibility?
  What would that flexibility look like? What would it help you to achieve?
  

We are so focused on healthy, clean eating in our society today – no sugar substitutes, no GMOs, no HFCS – the list goes on. But how much do we pay attention to the diets of our minds and our hearts and our souls? I think this is a truly important question to ask, so we’ll ask it of ourselves today.

This is not a reason to panic or to throw out every media device that we own – but it is a reason to more closely monitor what we are exposing our minds to. Our brains are always on—continuously taking in data and storing it.
In order for us to be the best versions of ourselves, we need to monitor this input and regulate it.

We need to ask ourselves the difficult questions and we must stop believing the lie that we are immune to the influences of negative media.
Do the television shows and movies that you watch enrich your life or do they add to a storehouse of fear and worry? Do the books you read give you healthy mental nutrition or are they filled with empty filth?
Does the time you invest on social media help to build relationships and encourage you or does it breed feelings of mistrust, fear, envy, and negativity? Does the music you listen to uplift and inspire you or does it send you into an emotional tailspin? And what about your relationships—do the friends you spend your time with fill your mind with healthy encouragement and truth?

There are great movies and music and books and friends. Social media can absolutely be a useful and encouraging part of your life. But only if you deliberately control the diet of what you are feeding your mind.

We always have a choice.

• Exercise:
  What parts of your mental consumption need to go on a diet?
  What healthy alternatives can you add to your life to build proper mental nutrition?
  

Love is a choice

The most powerful choice you will ever make in your life is the choice to love.

We are all inherently lovable. We derive a worth and value that is not based on anything we do or become.

When we arrive at the conclusion that we are all inherently lovable, then for us to love anyone … all we have to do is decide. There isn’t anything we have to do; there are no conditions or expectations to meet that make us lovable.

This concept of love being a decision extends to far more relationships than marriage. Is there something your kids could do that would negate your love for them? How about your parents? Or your friends?

Today, let’s think about what our relationships would look like if our love were truly unconditional. Let’s think about what our world would look like if we treated people as though their worth was inherent in their existence and not based on living up to a set of criteria. Let’s think about the way we love ourselves too. What sort of criteria are we placing on our own worth?

We always have a choice.

• Exercise:
  Think about a relationship in your life that is based on conditional love.
  What steps could you take to make that love unconditional?

Forgiveness is a choice

Forgiveness is a choice that sets us free from the mindsets, feelings, and habits of behavior that bind us to our past and limit us in our experiences of today.

True forgiveness is never about the other person. It is not about the offense, it is not about punishment or vindication, it is not about proving that I am right. It is never really about them… it is always about me. It is about releasing anger and bitterness and blame and embracing grace instead.

We can make the choice about which way to go on the journey to forgive.

Who in your life do you need to forgive? Maybe it’s another person, someone who has wronged you. You know who it is. Or maybe, just maybe, that forgiveness needs to go inward. Maybe you just need to forgive yourself.

Forgiveness is a choice. It’s a choice that sets us free from the mindsets, feelings, and habits of behavior that bind us to our past and limit us in our experience of today.

We always have a choice.

• Exercise:
  Write down the person in your life that you most need to forgive.
  Write down how you will feel differently once you no longer possess the need to see a price paid for that offense.

Happiness is a choice

One of the core parts of the Dynamic Living seminar is the statement: “You always have a choice. You can choose to be happy or you can choose to be grumpy. It’s always better, it’s always smarter, it’s always wiser to choose to be happy.”

While this may seem like a small decision that we must make over and over each day—or even each hour or minute—it can make all the difference.

Now … it’s not always easier. Quite the opposite sometimes!

There are circumstances of life that can break our hearts and defeat our spirits for a time.

I’m not suggesting that you shouldn’t grieve or mourn the tragedies of life. I’m not suggesting that life is just blue skies and smooth sailing if we just “choose to be happy”.

What I am suggesting is that we have a choice even in the tragedies. Do we let them define us, derail us, and defeat us? Or do we choose to look for the good? Do we realize that life is still worth living, dreams are still worth chasing, and happiness is still worth choosing?

We always have a choice.

• Exercise:
  Think of a situation in your life where you are having a hard time choosing to be happy.
  Write down 3 good things that can come from that situation

Responsibility is a choice

Making this choice can radically change your life, but it requires a strength of character.

Situations, events, and occurrences will happen throughout the course of our lives. These instances might be good or they might be bad. We always have a choice of how we will respond. We are, after all, response-able.

If it’s a bad situation we can choose to assign blame and be a victim of circumstances outside of our control. Or we can choose to be response-able and control what we can: our response.

We can only control what we can control: our response.

There are also times in life where we are responsible for bad things that happen to us. Poor choices do lead to hard consequences, and there is no getting around that fact.

The response-able choice is to own up to the mistakes, and then move on towards something better.

Responsibility for our actions is a choice. If more of us would make this choice, our world would be a far better place.

• Exercise:
  Is there an area in your life where you feel like a victim? How can you choose a response-able attitude instead?